How to deal with big changes in your life
- Kirsten Jacobson
- Aug 19, 2019
- 2 min read
Updated: Apr 14

Change is a constant in life, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to deal with—especially when it’s big. Whether it's moving to a new city, switching careers, ending a relationship, or facing unexpected health challenges, major life changes can shake your sense of stability and identity. But they can also be powerful catalysts for growth.
Here are some practical and compassionate ways to navigate life’s big transitions:
1. Let Yourself Feel It
First things first—don’t rush to "fix" your feelings. Change can bring a swirl of emotions: fear, excitement, grief, anxiety, hope. Let yourself sit with those feelings without judgment. This emotional honesty creates space for healing and clarity. Remember, it's okay to feel overwhelmed.
Pro tip: Journaling can be a powerful way to process emotions and track your journey through the change.
2. Focus on What You Can Control
Big changes often highlight how much is out of our control. Instead of spiraling into “what ifs,” redirect your energy toward what you can influence: your mindset, your routines, your responses. Even small actions—like making your bed, going for a walk, or sticking to a morning ritual—can restore a sense of stability.
Draw a line down a piece of paper and make a list of the things you can vs. can't control. It will help really refine what you can influence when everything feels chaotic.
3. Reach Out for Support
You’re not meant to do this alone. Talk to a friend, family member, mentor, or therapist. Sometimes just voicing what you’re going through can lift a huge weight. Connection reminds you that you’re not the only one navigating life’s storms.
If you’re someone who tends to isolate during hard times, challenge yourself to open up—even just a little. Vulnerability isn’t weakness; it’s strength in action.
4. Give Yourself Time
Adjusting to big change is a process, not a sprint. Be patient. Growth rarely happens overnight. You might not have all the answers yet, and that’s okay. Trust that with time, things will begin to feel more manageable—and maybe even exciting.
Reminder: It’s okay if you don’t feel “back to normal” right away. You’re creating a new normal.
5. Find Meaning in the Shift
While not every change has a silver lining, many do hold unexpected gifts. Ask yourself:
What am I learning from this?
How have I grown because of this?
What new possibilities are opening up?
Finding purpose in the transition can transform fear into fuel. It doesn’t erase the hard parts, but it helps you move forward with intention.
6. Be Kind to Yourself
Lastly, practice self-compassion. Speak to yourself like you would a close friend. It’s easy to fall into the trap of “I should be handling this better,” but that only adds unnecessary pressure. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s more than enough.
Big life changes can feel like standing on shifting ground. But every ending holds the seed of a new beginning. With time, support, and self-compassion, you can not only survive change—you can grow through it.
Embrace the mess. Honor the transition. Trust the process.
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